Immediate Response Required….?

[So this isn’t exactly the “perfect” song for this post but it’s the first one that came to my mind when I was thinking about the phone so I’m going with my gut. The song of choice is telephone by Lady Gaga. The song is now stuck in my head so be warned the same may happen to you. Enjoy!] 

I’ve always been a fairly impatient person. Impatient about almost everything. My running joke is that patience is a virtue I do not have. I still struggle with being patient but I’ve gotten a lot better.

When I was younger, younger than I am now, the smallest things would cause my impatience to flare up. I mean really small, like someone’s not responding to my text message right away. In our current day and age with the kind of technology we have I think we can all struggle with this at times. It sounds silly but it was a point of great irritation to me. I could not understand why others could not respond to me in a timely manner. In my head a lack of a quick response automatically signaled that 1. the person did not want to talk to me or, 2. did not have time for me or 3. was avoiding me. I’m not kidding.

This type of thinking caused many disagreements with family and friends and aggravation in my own life. I caused undue stress on myself. I could not accept that a slow response could possibly mean none of those things.

How did my thinking change you ask? First hand experience.

As I’ve gotten older I myself sometimes don’t answer messages right away. Sometimes it’s because I see the message, get wrapped up in something else, and forget to respond until hours or days later. Other times it’s because I see the message and need time to process before I respond. All responses should not and cannot be immediate. I’m still working on that one the most. My emotions can still get the better of me at times. Other times it’s because I’ve chosen to leave my phone behind as a means to disconnect.  I purposefully do not look at my phone. All these reasons lead to not responding right away.

It took my own experience for me to understand that others may be doing the same thing. I’ve come to learn that if something requires an immediate response it is best to call the person. If it’s that urgent then it’s probably best to communicate via a call then a text.

I used to also get upset when folks cancelled or changed plans on me last minute. I’d get so frustrated by the fact that I was ready to meet up and then they cancelled last minute. Now, as an adult, who has a full time job that can be exhausting/demanding at times, I get it. Life happens. Work gets in the way. Sometimes we are tired. Sometimes we just need to take a moment for ourselves. Again, I learned this lesson by first hand experience. I’ve cancelled on folks last minute and have seen their grace and understanding when I’ve done it. I’ve also seen the opposite and been frustrated by others vocal response to my needing to cancel.

I do try to keep the plans I make as I do not want others to feel like they are not important to me but if I need to cancel, I cancel. I appreciate those that get it and don’t give me a hard time. In return, I try to do the same.

Life is complicated enough without adding extra pieces of aggravation or irritation. So if you’re like I used to be, the next time someone doesn’t get back to you right away, ask yourself, how would I want them to react if I did the same thing? Maybe you’ll end up exactly where I am now.

[Photo by Kaboompics .com from Pexels]